I always got a lot of laughs while watching Jeff Foxworthy with his routine, "You Might Be A Redneck." You've all heard some of his "You might be a redneck:"
- If you mow your lawn and discover a car.
- If your dad walks you to school because you're both in the same grade.
- If someone asks to see your ID and you show them your beltbuckle.
- If someone comes to your door every day thinking you might be having a yard sale.
- If you ever made change in the 'offering' plate.
- If you go to a family reunion to meet women.
You get the idea, I'm sure.
Well, Veracity Stew has printed out a "You might be..." of it's own. Only this one is the "You might be an extremist" test. Here's a sampling:
YOU MIGHT BE A POLITICAL EXTREMIST IF:
- If you think an Assault Weapons Ban “gives jackbooted Government thugs more power to take away our constitutional rights, break in our doors, seize our guns, destroy our property and even injure and kill us”…
- If you try to control what other people do with their stinky parts…
- If you display any Confederate flag in any way….
- If you think there is a spy drone in the sky watching you in your backyard….
- If you think the federal government feels constrained in any way by the fact that Skeeter in Southswamp, Georgia, owns an AR-15
- If you think paying taxes is the same thing as slavery….
- If you still think there is any doubt that the globe is heating up or that human activity is a driver….
- If you resent it when government or business communicates with people in a language other than English….
- If you think that the president is a socialist, fascist, communist or any twisted combination thereof….
- If you question the president’s birthplace and citizenship….
- If you think Obama is intending to create a “new” military, as strong as the U.S. military, answerable only to him….
- If you think you, as en employer, have the “right” to impose your morals on your employees….
- If you think the government is secretly plotting to take away all guns….
- If you support giving full legal and constitutional rights to fertilized eggs….
- If you think that people standing in a group and singing songs is a reason to tackle, handcuff, arrest, jail, and fine the singers….
- If you think it’s a good day when children living in poverty cannot get government nutritional assistance….
- If only 23% of Americans believe your party is “in touch with the concerns of most people in the United States today,” and 70% believe that it is “out of touch”….
- If you’re calling for assassination, secession or insurrection….
- If you have to gerrymander voting districts and disenfranchise millions of voters to win elections….
- If you think it’s OK for an armed, full-grown man to pursue and kill an unarmed boy….
- If you’re willing to shut down the government over women’s access to contraception….
Do you see yourself in any of the above? If you wish to find more, check out the full list here: The Extremest ID Test For All Political Factions
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